jerk

convinced that his life was boring, not being able to belong to a subculture, bickering with his grandmother, reading the same sentence a few million times before realizing he didn't want to read it, stuttering before his new crush and dropping the test-tube when she glanced at him, getting average marks and dreading justifying the same to his parents, going out to play football and being laughed at, taking out his new bicycle and being laughed at, trying to laugh along and wanting to cry, eating the same food every night, not being able to understand and reproduce the hep lingo, not wanting to wake up any morning, bullied in school, cheating once and getting caught, dreading justifying the same to his parents, lightly bumping his head into the mirror, screaming fucking screaming when his parents were out, picking up a rusted blade from somewhere and trembling head-to-toe and looking at the mirror and wanting to do the only thing that would save his life, screaming at his reflection, throwing the blade into the dustbin, banging his head into the mirror, screaming and banging and screaming, getting tired and sleeping off, waking up and overhearing his parents discuss about his incompetence at pretty much everything, dreading justifying the same.